Jazmine Sullivan is and always will be one of my number one favorite R&B female artist along with H.E.R. After listening to her new 2021 music project release I was inspired to write about this song and how it's relatable to myself and so many other young women who may be able to relate to these similar experiences. Often times in our society today the term good girl is considered as the hopeful girl who never wins. We are constantly overlooked and casted to the side for what they call the fantasy girl aka bad girl who is a social media model or influencer. This bad girl has the big booty, small waist and is very promiscuous and without any effort gains the attention of so many different men getting whatever she wants. However women like myself who are the good girls are pushed to the side or not even appreciated for being different and having manners, morals, intelligence and class. Being a good girl is not always fun at times you feel that being good is just not good enough and does not get you anywhere but left alone with a broken heart.
I believe I connect with this song so much because I've always asked myself the question why these hoes be winning. I'm not saying everyone one is a hoe because to be honest the term hoe has been used out of context for a long time. Both men and women get different backlashes when it comes to this term. Men are often called a hoe when they sleep around with multiple women and juggle between having their needs met by different women. While women who are labeled as a hoe is because they sleep with different men or talk to men to get what they want. Our society has everyone blinded and believing that what is really good for you is bad and whats bad for you is good. At some point in life every woman has experienced heart break and been cheated on because that man we cared about so much left us for someone else. As a woman we already have our own levels of insecurities that we struggle with on a daily. But the icing on the cake has always been that no matter how good of a woman you are to a man he leaves you for someone else. I don't understand and never will why men constantly want the ideal of having a good girl around in their life but want to mess around with other women and end up leaving you for them. It hurts us to core when this happens because we've sacrifice so much of our time, body, money, career, family, and friendships to be with you. You lead us one to think you want us but then when we look up you leave us for the fantasy bad girl who breaks all the rules with no standards or morals.
When we are left for someone else it breaks us on the inside because we start to tear ourselves apart from within. We feel like we have to compare ourselves to other women known as the hoes because that's what we are always being left for. At times we don't even know why we still continue to be a good girl anymore. Maybe we should take the non spoken advice from the bad girls and do what they do because clearly they have and know something we don't know. Truth is no matter how pretty you are how much personality you have if you are not apart of what is trending you will always be left behind. I personally have had so many guys that I have talked to where I look up and they end up leaving me to be with someone else. I've been rejected and told I'm not good enough or that I was just to bougie to be with because they felt they couldn't afford me and the lifestyle I'm accustom to. Getting blocked on social media or being ghosted for no reason definitely hurts you to the core knowing that you've done nothing wrong but been good to a person.
Good girls will always be good and bad girls will continue take over until men understand the real truth of how they make women feel. You can not appreciate the value of a good girl until you understand that we are and always will be one of a kind and hard to find. My mom has always taught me that when a man wants to leave don't beg him to stay and never chase him let him go where he wants to be. Then Iyanla Vanzant says " never let a man tell you more than once that he doesn't want you let him go." Don't ever feel like your not good enough because a man leaves you for someone else. It does hurt you in the beginning and has you questioning who you are and your worth. Sometimes the good girl turns bad because we feel that's who we have to become because that's who and what we are left for. I just got one question why do you men always go after these hoes???????????????? is that really something different?????????? Okay I'm done what are you guys thoughts on this and have you experienced this? Like, Share and leave you comments below I want to know your thoughts.